The Good: For the first time in a long time I felt some
relief in my body. Was it from the
acupuncture? Was it from the terribly
healthy diet gone terribly healthier?
Was it from the new exercises?
Or was it just some force deciding I needed a
Freaking Break???
I have no idea what changed what, and although
I didn’t cry tears of joy over this, those fake tears that roll down my face
from the eye drops were close enough!
The Bad: I’m having a conversation with a woman who has a not so common type of
cancer, not so common as in hers doesn’t have the pretty pink ribbon attached
to it like mine does. She feels that if
she had that “status” she’d get more attention, better follow-up, and perhaps
greater results if only she had that ribbon.
I assured her that you can be draped from head
to toe in pretty coloured ribbons, even have them tattooed on your body as a
symbol of where you’ve been, it makes no difference. When you walk through those glass doors into the
beige walls and lab coats, there are no favourites; we all have to fight from
start to finish to be heard, to be noticed, and we all have to push our way
through the system even after treatments are done.
The What the ???: Flash Back to company Christmas
Party of the past... What will I wear?
Shall I shop for a new dress?
Does this hand bag go with this outfit?
Fast Forward to company Christmas Party of the
future... How many stares will I get from people I haven’t seen for a while? How much pain will I be in and will I be able
to hide it? Will my make-up run because
my eyes won’t stop watering from the lingering effects of chemo?
Lessons Learned: While cleaning out my
e-mails, I came across this message from a friend of mine.
“One of
the many things we humans share (other than thumbs and kneecaps) is that we all
have problems. Obviously some are
trivial and some are most definitely NOT... But we all try to work through them
the best we can. They influence us, taint us, scar us, but I think they help us
too... only if we overcome them though. They certainly are a part of who we
become as the years stream by.”
While
this wasn’t a message related to my diagnosis of cancer, I read it as if it was, and I’ll keep it to read
again.
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