January 21, 2011
The Good: I bought a wig, wahoooo!! (see below for a sample).
The Good: I bought a wig, wahoooo!! (see below for a sample).
I must say though, I’m most comfortable without it, and I no longer cringe when I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror, I feel like me again, just bald J .
Having said that, it can be fun to wear a wig but I still prefer my hats, they cover my head, not my cancer, I’m ok with that now, you can look...
The Bad: I sometimes feel lost in the system, so many rules, things to remember, and the next person never says the same thing as the last person, and the person after that says something different... today I was asked to lie down in a bed for a new treatment rather than a chair which is what I’m used to, she said it was in case I wanted to nap as the new stuff could make me drowsy, the chair reclines so I didn’t see any reason to switch, she said ok and bounced off... another nurse came by asking why I wasn’t in a bed, she said I needed to be in a flat position in case of an emergency, that explanation I understood and I moved, there is a slight difference between the two explanations... I asked about side effects from the new drugs, bouncy girl said there were none; the women sitting beside me receiving chemo gave me the real scoop... its times like this that I feel myself getting sucked in... So rather than going under, I get defensive, and by the time I reach that last person, I’m pissed at the one who’s giving me what I want.
It scares me when I’m not informed, when I don’t feel like I’m doing everything I can to educate myself, prepare myself, and make the right choices, it scares me when I start to feel the water going over my head.
I promised myself today that the next time I feel myself going under, I’ll take a moment and swim, then I’ll ask another person, and swim, and I’ll keep swimming until I get what I want... I’m a strong swimmer; I’ll get to where I need to be, minus the defence on my end.
The What the ??: The name of the wig I bought was called “Natalie”, which happens to be the name of the person I went wig shopping with, yeah, I know, FREAKY!
This made me wonder, why do wigs get these names, and who’s Natalie?? So I googled: why do wigs have peoples names, and the first hit was: Do Earwigs Crawl in People's Ears and Bore into Their Brains ...
No, I don’t know if there is a connection between wigs, earwigs, and my poor brain as I chose not to click on that link... I do know the next time I see one of those little buggers I’ll probably smile instead of going ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!
Lessons Learned: Wigs are FUN, defences are BAD, google at your own RISK, and long walks along the canal feed my BODY, MIND and SOUL in that order.
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