The Good: I’ve reached a point where I’m fed up with hospitals, treatments, the whole cancer package... Its official, I HATE CANCER!!!
Throughout this process, what has helped me the most are the people in my life who just stand by me... they don’t offer false hope or expectations, they don’t try to convince me I shouldn’t be sad or upset, they don’t try to change how I feel, they listen and let me be me, whoever I might be on that day, they let me be that person with no judgement.
United I stand, Divided I fall...
The Bad: He said to me “I worry about you when I don’t see you, but when I see you I feel ok, you look strong...”
I feel strong most days, but I do investigate the odds and what my outcome may be, and statistically speaking the coin is weighted but I’m hoping to catch life on the flip side of those stats.
The What the ???: So I’m feeling a bit whimpy after getting my “markings” , maybe my nerve damage is worse than I think so I speak to my physiotherapist about the experience. She has a patient covered in tattoos who said the “markings” hurt more than any ink she’s had done, hmmmm... apparently others have complained about how painful it is as well.
I’m thinking that anyone who works with these “markings” and whoever came up with this marvellous idea should try them so they know firsthand how it feels and can explain the experience better to patients... then the conversation would go something like this: “I’m going to take this long pin and stick it in you, then I’m going to move it around and leave some dye behind marking the spot, I’m going to do this to you approx. 7 times in various spots and it’s going to hurt.”
I can go to a shady tattoo parlour and feel less pain than at a major hospital who can’t invest in a tool not unlike a tattoo gun... If you look into the eyes of a cancer patient you’ll see we’ve gone through a lot, in the end, I guess it’s the all mighty buck that influences our system in many ways. And what’s a little more pain to people like us... as I’ve been reminded on many occasions; I should just be thankful to be alive.
Suck it up Buttercup and keep your mouth shut, you’re not going to change the system, smile like the good cancer patient that you are...
Lessons Learned: Blueberry Picking fell through, the place was closed, but if you drive around enough in the Navan area you’ll come across a winery, what a pleasant surprise for someone like me who’s trapped in her downtown bubble! http://www.domaineperrault.ca/ourhistory.html
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