The Good: I’ve learned the importance of looking you in
the eye when I toast to any occasion, I’ve learned to hug you before you hug
me, I’ve learned to take a step back in order to get somewhere faster, I’ve
learned people are far more unique than I’d noticed before, I’ve learned it’s
ok to ask for help, I’ve learned pain reminds me I can feel, I’ve learned other
people hurt when I’m in pain, I’ve learned my anger towards cancer is my will
to survive... I’ve learned I want to learn more.
The Bad:
The What the ???: A very special friend gave me a solar powered chime... it’s quite pretty
yet I was puzzled as to how it would work.
Is it going to chime like crazy while the sun is out, and teeter off at
dusk? Does it need to charge for a day to gain energy and then chime periodically
in the days to come? Do I get enough
direct sun light to get this baby going???
Throughout our visit it chimed every so often, and unlike a wind chime, it’s unexpected because there’s no wind to cue the chime, which makes it special when it does. And then it got cloudy, and assuming it never got fully charged, the chimes stopped, and it hung there... and then she left.
Shortly after her departure, there are still no
chimes, and I’m writing an e-mail thanking her for the gift, saying how it hasn’t
chimed since she left, and at that moment, it chimes, just for a short bit, but
long enough to make me say “what the??” and then it was gone, and it hasn’t
chimed since.
Lessons Learned: She smiles when she sees
me, genuine as she says “you look really good, how are you feeling?”
We go through the standard question and answer
period, blah blah blah... and then she asks “how are you doing on tamoxifen (nasty
drug that keeps evil cancer cells away)?”
I explain that it didn’t work out, I gave it the old college try but in
the end I’d rather take my chances out on the street. She lifted her arm and rested
her elbow on the examining table beside her, I was in a chair across, she then
let her head fall onto that same arm into her hand, her eyes down, but her
face couldn’t lie, she genuinely cared what happened to me, or rather, she wasn’t
afraid to show me that she did.
She and I didn’t click on our first meeting, since
then I’ve gotten to know and trust her judgement, that day is when she earned
my respect.
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